5.27.2005
And all the world is football shaped, it's just for me to kick it's face.
So...guys...like I'm sure I've said before...I'm ready to get the fuck out.
Remember how I said I was going to make it through my bout of spring fever without quitting my job? Well, I lied. There was a little bit of something that made me crack this year...not that it's serious or anything, but it was enough to make me act.
I decided about a month or so ago that I needed to get out of town for a significant amount of time. And I'm ready to answer questions...although most of you probably know most of these answers...but anyway, here we go:
1. Why?: My life is pretty much just a bunch of bullshit. I figured that I could continue this life of bullshit someplace else...at least for a little while.
Also, my little brother is finally moving into town. I think it's about time that he takes over that task of answering my mother's three-time-a-day phone calls.
2. Where?: I'm moving myself up to Cape Cod, USA...at least for the summer months.
3. Are you coming back?: Of course I am. My master plan is to come back in October, meet a girl name Brandy and explain to her, that while she is a fine girl....that my life, my love and my lady is the sea...and then I'll move back to the Cape. Saying this and meaning it has always been one of my goals in life.
4. What is this wishy-washiness?: Wouldn't you like to know?
5. Look bitch. I haven't been reading your blog for this long only to be now told that I'm not getting any details. So, what the hell spured this?:
Geezz, you just don't give up, do you? So...I started a job explanation...and then realized that it was just as lame and just as similar to my past service industry "this sucks" explanation. So, then I started a relationship explanation and realized...that, yes...it was just as lame as my past relationship excuses. So, when it comes down to it...It's all lame...and I'm sick of it all.
Passive aggressive, Nuevo disco, retro-cool, small-town-compassion, conservative-liberal politics, music loving/hating snobbiness, indecisive, independent lemmingness..........all of this is embodied in myself.
Anymore explaining? Because I can draw out the details as I pleasantly kick in the teeth of a patsy...
6. Ouch. Well. We won't go there. Are you going to keep blogging during your sabbatical?: I haven't decided yet. We'll just leave it at...well...we'll see. It actually all depends on whether I can think of a good name...any suggestions?
7. Because you're leaving...can I give you a hug?: Don't touch me.
Remember how I said I was going to make it through my bout of spring fever without quitting my job? Well, I lied. There was a little bit of something that made me crack this year...not that it's serious or anything, but it was enough to make me act.
I decided about a month or so ago that I needed to get out of town for a significant amount of time. And I'm ready to answer questions...although most of you probably know most of these answers...but anyway, here we go:
1. Why?: My life is pretty much just a bunch of bullshit. I figured that I could continue this life of bullshit someplace else...at least for a little while.
Also, my little brother is finally moving into town. I think it's about time that he takes over that task of answering my mother's three-time-a-day phone calls.
2. Where?: I'm moving myself up to Cape Cod, USA...at least for the summer months.
3. Are you coming back?: Of course I am. My master plan is to come back in October, meet a girl name Brandy and explain to her, that while she is a fine girl....that my life, my love and my lady is the sea...and then I'll move back to the Cape. Saying this and meaning it has always been one of my goals in life.
4. What is this wishy-washiness?: Wouldn't you like to know?
5. Look bitch. I haven't been reading your blog for this long only to be now told that I'm not getting any details. So, what the hell spured this?:
Geezz, you just don't give up, do you? So...I started a job explanation...and then realized that it was just as lame and just as similar to my past service industry "this sucks" explanation. So, then I started a relationship explanation and realized...that, yes...it was just as lame as my past relationship excuses. So, when it comes down to it...It's all lame...and I'm sick of it all.
Passive aggressive, Nuevo disco, retro-cool, small-town-compassion, conservative-liberal politics, music loving/hating snobbiness, indecisive, independent lemmingness..........all of this is embodied in myself.
Anymore explaining? Because I can draw out the details as I pleasantly kick in the teeth of a patsy...
6. Ouch. Well. We won't go there. Are you going to keep blogging during your sabbatical?: I haven't decided yet. We'll just leave it at...well...we'll see. It actually all depends on whether I can think of a good name...any suggestions?
7. Because you're leaving...can I give you a hug?: Don't touch me.
5.24.2005
Now THAT's high tech!
I was forced to patronize a Kinko's the other day...after spending a few days of keeping my eyes open for a single copy machine somewhere, I finally caved in. Why is it impossible to find a single copy machine anymore? Does anyone else remember the days of 3 cent copies at your local convenience store? Anyway...
I needed to make ONE copy. I approached the clerk at the main counter with a quarter in my hand:
Me: "Hello. I need to make one copy."
Klerk (open-mouthed and looking kind of confused): "Uh...ok. Are you going to be paying cash or credit?"
Me: "Um, cash."
Klerk: "Uh....ok. Well, there's a kiosk over there behind those greeting cards. You can either use cash or credit to put copy credit on a Kinko's card. Or, if you're using credit, you can just swipe your card at the machine."
Me: "Card...right...ok. Thanks."
So, I proceeded over to the kiosk machine and spent my well-earned brain power on figuring out the confounded machine...only to find out that the minimum number of copies that I can purchase for a Kinko's card is 10. Ten? Ten copies? I could purchase this number of copies on a Kinko's card, but when the hell am I going to use them?
I need ONE copy. I have a quarter.
Pushing on...I made my way over to the jumbo, intense copy machines. They were all so scary...and to add to my fear, some of the machines had large, bold signs on them that stated, "WARNING! THIS IS COLOR COPY MACHINE. COPIES ARE $.29 A PIECE."
Whoa. Stay away from those mothers!
So, I cautiously made my way to another machine that would hopefully let me copy with a bit less admonishment. I finally found one of these machines and I started searching its outer casing for one of those holes that lets you put money into it...what are those things called? Coin slots? But, as the klerk told me earlier, I can either purchase a fucking Kinko's card or use my credit card at the machine.
At this point, I had reached the pinnacle of my frustration...I swiped my bank card in the machine and finally made the ONE copy that I needed. I put the quarter back in my pocket and left the establishment.
This evening, I checked the status of my bank account online. The charge from Kinko's had finally been posted...8 cents. I had used my Visa Check card to make an 8 cent purchase. I know for a fact that the transaction fees that Kinko's paid in order to allow me to use my check card cost them more than 8 cents.
But, really, it was the convenience I was paying for, not the copy.
I'm not really sure if this counts as irony or not, but the copy...that I so desperately needed to make...was of my previous months' pay stubs. I had to prove to the government that, at this time, I'm too poor to pay back my student loans.
In reality, I guess this doesn't count as irony. But, deep down inside I was sort of hoping that this transaction would overdraw my bank account. It didn't, of course...
I needed to make ONE copy. I approached the clerk at the main counter with a quarter in my hand:
Me: "Hello. I need to make one copy."
Klerk (open-mouthed and looking kind of confused): "Uh...ok. Are you going to be paying cash or credit?"
Me: "Um, cash."
Klerk: "Uh....ok. Well, there's a kiosk over there behind those greeting cards. You can either use cash or credit to put copy credit on a Kinko's card. Or, if you're using credit, you can just swipe your card at the machine."
Me: "Card...right...ok. Thanks."
So, I proceeded over to the kiosk machine and spent my well-earned brain power on figuring out the confounded machine...only to find out that the minimum number of copies that I can purchase for a Kinko's card is 10. Ten? Ten copies? I could purchase this number of copies on a Kinko's card, but when the hell am I going to use them?
I need ONE copy. I have a quarter.
Pushing on...I made my way over to the jumbo, intense copy machines. They were all so scary...and to add to my fear, some of the machines had large, bold signs on them that stated, "WARNING! THIS IS COLOR COPY MACHINE. COPIES ARE $.29 A PIECE."
Whoa. Stay away from those mothers!
So, I cautiously made my way to another machine that would hopefully let me copy with a bit less admonishment. I finally found one of these machines and I started searching its outer casing for one of those holes that lets you put money into it...what are those things called? Coin slots? But, as the klerk told me earlier, I can either purchase a fucking Kinko's card or use my credit card at the machine.
At this point, I had reached the pinnacle of my frustration...I swiped my bank card in the machine and finally made the ONE copy that I needed. I put the quarter back in my pocket and left the establishment.
This evening, I checked the status of my bank account online. The charge from Kinko's had finally been posted...8 cents. I had used my Visa Check card to make an 8 cent purchase. I know for a fact that the transaction fees that Kinko's paid in order to allow me to use my check card cost them more than 8 cents.
But, really, it was the convenience I was paying for, not the copy.
I'm not really sure if this counts as irony or not, but the copy...that I so desperately needed to make...was of my previous months' pay stubs. I had to prove to the government that, at this time, I'm too poor to pay back my student loans.
In reality, I guess this doesn't count as irony. But, deep down inside I was sort of hoping that this transaction would overdraw my bank account. It didn't, of course...
5.23.2005
Science....yo.
I don't get it...and I hope that I've never claimed to "get it." There have been times in my life when certain substances that I've ingested have led me to belive that I "got it"....and then I found myself twitching on the bathroom floor while giggling about the complex meanings of moon phases and their relations to Honey Combs cerel...
....If you people have the patience to make it through the following copy and pasted dialouge that went on between my friend and I ...maybe you can find out some way to "get it" (I've tried to edit it in order to make it legible, but give me a break....really...I already know my spelling is horrible)...AND damn if it ain't long....oh, and the parenthesis remarks are my afterthoughts:
Oh yeah. I'm M2...friend be M1. I could be more descript...but it's more fun when you have to go back and think about it six times over...
M1: Ahoy!
12:00 AM
M2: sup Chile dweller?
M1: what's new
M1: still cloudy
M1: i wish i could just go to bed
M2: not much...just worked and had the drinks at the bar
early tonight
M1: but then i guess my schedule would be off again, and we have 3 nights to go
big money?
M2: do you have to stay up and wait for the clouds to pass?
M1: nah
M2: it was slow all day
M2: I was expecting a 12 hour day and ended up with a 4 and a half
not too bad for that time though
12:05 AM
M2: have the clouds cleared and allowed an unobstructed view of the cosmos?
M1: alas no
we were just laughing at my students stupid comments page again
http://newphysics.diaryland.com
in case you'd like to review
so priceless
M2: oh, but I do
M2: "Iron helps us play!"
M1: hee
M2: quoting the Simpsons never seems to get old
M1: your ronald is so creepy
M1: did i tell you about the cookies i'm eating?
M2: no
M1: i went to babelfish to translate their name, and they are "capsules"
M2: but, I like my Ronald's creepiness factor
M2: how postmodern
M1: what's more, they are "mouthful" flavored
12:20 AM
M2: that's not a flavor.!
M1: they're really those wafer cookies that come in vanilla chocolate and pink
M1: no, it's not
M2: That's an adjective used to describe a state
M2: certainly not a flavor
M1: and there's a savory-looking picture of a raw cracked open egg on the package too
mmm.... egg...
M2: sounds tasty in the first description
I don't know about cracked egg flavor though
Is that supposed to demonstrate their farm-fresh tasty goodness?
M2: I love myself some farm fresh cookies!
M2: I like the "The sun is the most gaseous star in our solar system and the brightest!" (in reference to the previously mentioned link...)
M2: that's it...I'm coming to live with you and get an advanced degree in Astro Physics
M1: at least they got that it was a star
M2: true...it could be a planet
or a comet
M1: that comes up later, pluto being a star
M2: or maybe a "sun" is a cosmic being unto itself
M2: you mean, it's not? (by the way, sarcasim doesn't play all that great in writing...)
M1: you could totally put the smack down on some of the grad students
M2: wait, I thought it was a mysterious comet
M1: my advisor was just making fun of them even
M1: well, i can't tell you the truth about pluto over the internet like this
M2: scandelous
M1: someone might intercept the message
M2: like, God?
M1: sssh!
M1: i told you about how it was "dropped off" i thought
M2: no...I don't think so
M1: it's an alien transponder station!
M2: oh, that's right
M2: I can buy that
M1: it's just close enough that they can monitor us and report back to the main system
M2: have we still not seen the other side?
M1: i think it faces us, but pluto's moon intercepts the transmissions from pluto and sends them back to the home star
shhhh!
M2: so, seriously...in a non-serious way...does studying all this stuff make you think there's something else out there?
M1: home star...hmmm
M1: like, things that walk around like we do? probably not
but making amino acids and stuff is entirely probably
M2: no...not so much other humaniod things
M1: er, probably
M1: dammit
probable
M1: it's just a matter of the right conditions, distance from the star, chemical compositions, timescales, blah blah
M2: I have this LSD induced theory of different forms of energy
M1: people do stuff like that, work out the numbers and find the "habitable zone", where to look for earth-like planets around other stars
M2: well, I'm not a scientist, so it's not really a theory, but it's what I figured when I still did drugs
M1: oh, well, there is definitely something we can't see, like dark matter
and people talk about dark energy too but i dont' know anything about that except they talk about it
M2: which is what? Unformed engery?
M1: i could show you why we know there'sdark matter, but we'd need a piece of paper
M2: I think you've shown me it before
I don't remember the detail though
M1: i might not have, i only nailed it down in my head this semester
M2: it just seems so random...I mean, when you think about the slight things that make each human and individual...and for that matter, anything on this earth with DNA
I remember talking about dark matter with you
and black holes and such
M1: dark energy is (again, i know very little), energy that we know must exist to make up the total energy budget we estimate there is, but we don't detect it
i hope i didn't bs too much before
like, regular energy can be detected by looking at the amount of light emitted by something
basically, if you look at how fast a galaxy rotates, from center to the edge, it gets faster as you move away from the center and then levels out at some speed
M2: I think I understand...it's one of those basic physics things, right? The energy can't be destroyed so it has to go somewhere
physics again
M1: but rotation speed should be governed by how much mass is at a certain distance from the center, and once the galaxy starts to get less massive away from the center (less dense with stars and stuff), the speed should fall off and slow down after some radial distance
but it doesn't, so we know there's some other mass making it stay that fast
so there you have it, proof of dark matter
M2: I think I actually get it
M1: i find picture
M2: ok
M1: http://bustard.phys.nd.edu/Phys171/lectures/dm.html
look at the first graph with the "distribution of dark..."
does that play into the whole the ever extending galaxy thing?>
M2: i'm not that smart, but probably
M1 so, you got the figure?
M2: yeah
the graph needs some keys damnit
for us layman
M1: ok, so the "disk" curve shows how fast the rotation should go based on how much mass we see from stars
and the "NGC 3198" curve shows the rotation speeds we actually observe
in theory...right>
?
M2: yeah
that's alot of unaccounted for stuff
M1: well, we observe stars ok without any problem, and make a good mass estimate based on brightness
M1: so the "halo" is what makes up the difference, via this dark matter theory stuff
M2: I think it should be changed from the sci-fi "dark matter" to "unaccounted for stuff"
M1: people talk about a dark matter halo existing around galaxies
yeah, let's not act like we know what's going on here -- "and from graph a, we see a lot of stars and .. umm... i guess some other stuff... that we don't se..."
so...wow
M2: I'm learning
hence the "dark matter"...without light, there's absolutely no way to measure this stuff
M1: totally
M2: unless you go there...like Sphere
M2: only less lame
M1: to which the common response is, what the hell are you talking about, show me what exactly this dark matter could be made up of
and the response to that is ......buh....
M2: intense
M2: what are the running theories?
M1: you heard it
M1: buh
M1: i don't know, gravity particles or some insane shit
let's see what wikipedia has to say
M2: ok then
M2: I'm going with voices of unborn children
M2: gravity has particles?
M1: some crazy theories involve that
gravitrons!
M2: I feel like Devo needs to be involved in this discussion
M1: oh, and btw if that's all not crazy enough, guess what percentage of the universe is regular old, made-out-of-protons-and-electrons or energy-via-light, kind of matter?
you're not going to like this at all
M2: I'm gonna guess 75 percent
M1: like <5% href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dark_matter">http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dark_matter i'm even more confused after reading this
did you find any theories?
M1: i guess maybe dark matter is supposed to be made of normal particles, and dark energy isn't
M2: but it's still real shady and weird
M1: and i know people who don't believe in it
M2: that's it...I'm dedicating all my thinking to this
that are smart
M2: at least for the next two hours
M1: figure it out for us, i'll get it published for you
M2: well, what the hell do they think?
M1: man, i can't even get analysis done on pictures of stars
i don't know what kind of geniuses work on this
1:00 AM
M2: do they all hang out at the same school?
how confusing that would be
I like when you click on "Big Bang Theory" there's a sidenote at the top that states that this is also the title of a Bad Religion song
oh, and what a great album that is
M1: indeed
M1: i like that "ultimate fate of our present universe" is a whole link heading
this dark matter is going to make it hard for me to sleep at night
M2: I just clicked on that
M1: like it's tomorrow
that is the most ridiculous entry!
M2: well, did you follow the "life" link after that?
it's by definition, a multi-faceted concept
ultimate is so damn...definate
I much rather talk about the penultimate
M1: i'm also going to start using the word "disambiguation"
M2: so, what's going to happen right before the end of the universe, hmmm?
M1: rock and roll?
M1: cheese sandwiches?
M2: That would be cool
M2: Cats and manicures?
M1: disambiguation.
M2: that's a great word...I have to write it down and remember to use it
....If you people have the patience to make it through the following copy and pasted dialouge that went on between my friend and I ...maybe you can find out some way to "get it" (I've tried to edit it in order to make it legible, but give me a break....really...I already know my spelling is horrible)...AND damn if it ain't long....oh, and the parenthesis remarks are my afterthoughts:
Oh yeah. I'm M2...friend be M1. I could be more descript...but it's more fun when you have to go back and think about it six times over...
M1: Ahoy!
12:00 AM
M2: sup Chile dweller?
M1: what's new
M1: still cloudy
M1: i wish i could just go to bed
M2: not much...just worked and had the drinks at the bar
early tonight
M1: but then i guess my schedule would be off again, and we have 3 nights to go
big money?
M2: do you have to stay up and wait for the clouds to pass?
M1: nah
M2: it was slow all day
M2: I was expecting a 12 hour day and ended up with a 4 and a half
not too bad for that time though
12:05 AM
M2: have the clouds cleared and allowed an unobstructed view of the cosmos?
M1: alas no
we were just laughing at my students stupid comments page again
http://newphysics.diaryland.com
in case you'd like to review
so priceless
M2: oh, but I do
M2: "Iron helps us play!"
M1: hee
M2: quoting the Simpsons never seems to get old
M1: your ronald is so creepy
M1: did i tell you about the cookies i'm eating?
M2: no
M1: i went to babelfish to translate their name, and they are "capsules"
M2: but, I like my Ronald's creepiness factor
M2: how postmodern
M1: what's more, they are "mouthful" flavored
12:20 AM
M2: that's not a flavor.!
M1: they're really those wafer cookies that come in vanilla chocolate and pink
M1: no, it's not
M2: That's an adjective used to describe a state
M2: certainly not a flavor
M1: and there's a savory-looking picture of a raw cracked open egg on the package too
mmm.... egg...
M2: sounds tasty in the first description
I don't know about cracked egg flavor though
Is that supposed to demonstrate their farm-fresh tasty goodness?
M2: I love myself some farm fresh cookies!
M2: I like the "The sun is the most gaseous star in our solar system and the brightest!" (in reference to the previously mentioned link...)
M2: that's it...I'm coming to live with you and get an advanced degree in Astro Physics
M1: at least they got that it was a star
M2: true...it could be a planet
or a comet
M1: that comes up later, pluto being a star
M2: or maybe a "sun" is a cosmic being unto itself
M2: you mean, it's not? (by the way, sarcasim doesn't play all that great in writing...)
M1: you could totally put the smack down on some of the grad students
M2: wait, I thought it was a mysterious comet
M1: my advisor was just making fun of them even
M1: well, i can't tell you the truth about pluto over the internet like this
M2: scandelous
M1: someone might intercept the message
M2: like, God?
M1: sssh!
M1: i told you about how it was "dropped off" i thought
M2: no...I don't think so
M1: it's an alien transponder station!
M2: oh, that's right
M2: I can buy that
M1: it's just close enough that they can monitor us and report back to the main system
M2: have we still not seen the other side?
M1: i think it faces us, but pluto's moon intercepts the transmissions from pluto and sends them back to the home star
shhhh!
M2: so, seriously...in a non-serious way...does studying all this stuff make you think there's something else out there?
M1: home star...hmmm
M1: like, things that walk around like we do? probably not
but making amino acids and stuff is entirely probably
M2: no...not so much other humaniod things
M1: er, probably
M1: dammit
probable
M1: it's just a matter of the right conditions, distance from the star, chemical compositions, timescales, blah blah
M2: I have this LSD induced theory of different forms of energy
M1: people do stuff like that, work out the numbers and find the "habitable zone", where to look for earth-like planets around other stars
M2: well, I'm not a scientist, so it's not really a theory, but it's what I figured when I still did drugs
M1: oh, well, there is definitely something we can't see, like dark matter
and people talk about dark energy too but i dont' know anything about that except they talk about it
M2: which is what? Unformed engery?
M1: i could show you why we know there'sdark matter, but we'd need a piece of paper
M2: I think you've shown me it before
I don't remember the detail though
M1: i might not have, i only nailed it down in my head this semester
M2: it just seems so random...I mean, when you think about the slight things that make each human and individual...and for that matter, anything on this earth with DNA
I remember talking about dark matter with you
and black holes and such
M1: dark energy is (again, i know very little), energy that we know must exist to make up the total energy budget we estimate there is, but we don't detect it
i hope i didn't bs too much before
like, regular energy can be detected by looking at the amount of light emitted by something
basically, if you look at how fast a galaxy rotates, from center to the edge, it gets faster as you move away from the center and then levels out at some speed
M2: I think I understand...it's one of those basic physics things, right? The energy can't be destroyed so it has to go somewhere
physics again
M1: but rotation speed should be governed by how much mass is at a certain distance from the center, and once the galaxy starts to get less massive away from the center (less dense with stars and stuff), the speed should fall off and slow down after some radial distance
but it doesn't, so we know there's some other mass making it stay that fast
so there you have it, proof of dark matter
M2: I think I actually get it
M1: i find picture
M2: ok
M1: http://bustard.phys.nd.edu/Phys171/lectures/dm.html
look at the first graph with the "distribution of dark..."
does that play into the whole the ever extending galaxy thing?>
M2: i'm not that smart, but probably
M1 so, you got the figure?
M2: yeah
the graph needs some keys damnit
for us layman
M1: ok, so the "disk" curve shows how fast the rotation should go based on how much mass we see from stars
and the "NGC 3198" curve shows the rotation speeds we actually observe
in theory...right>
?
M2: yeah
that's alot of unaccounted for stuff
M1: well, we observe stars ok without any problem, and make a good mass estimate based on brightness
M1: so the "halo" is what makes up the difference, via this dark matter theory stuff
M2: I think it should be changed from the sci-fi "dark matter" to "unaccounted for stuff"
M1: people talk about a dark matter halo existing around galaxies
yeah, let's not act like we know what's going on here -- "and from graph a, we see a lot of stars and .. umm... i guess some other stuff... that we don't se..."
so...wow
M2: I'm learning
hence the "dark matter"...without light, there's absolutely no way to measure this stuff
M1: totally
M2: unless you go there...like Sphere
M2: only less lame
M1: to which the common response is, what the hell are you talking about, show me what exactly this dark matter could be made up of
and the response to that is ......buh....
M2: intense
M2: what are the running theories?
M1: you heard it
M1: buh
M1: i don't know, gravity particles or some insane shit
let's see what wikipedia has to say
M2: ok then
M2: I'm going with voices of unborn children
M2: gravity has particles?
M1: some crazy theories involve that
gravitrons!
M2: I feel like Devo needs to be involved in this discussion
M1: oh, and btw if that's all not crazy enough, guess what percentage of the universe is regular old, made-out-of-protons-and-electrons or energy-via-light, kind of matter?
you're not going to like this at all
M2: I'm gonna guess 75 percent
M1: like <5% href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dark_matter">http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dark_matter i'm even more confused after reading this
did you find any theories?
M1: i guess maybe dark matter is supposed to be made of normal particles, and dark energy isn't
M2: but it's still real shady and weird
M1: and i know people who don't believe in it
M2: that's it...I'm dedicating all my thinking to this
that are smart
M2: at least for the next two hours
M1: figure it out for us, i'll get it published for you
M2: well, what the hell do they think?
M1: man, i can't even get analysis done on pictures of stars
i don't know what kind of geniuses work on this
1:00 AM
M2: do they all hang out at the same school?
how confusing that would be
I like when you click on "Big Bang Theory" there's a sidenote at the top that states that this is also the title of a Bad Religion song
oh, and what a great album that is
M1: indeed
M1: i like that "ultimate fate of our present universe" is a whole link heading
this dark matter is going to make it hard for me to sleep at night
M2: I just clicked on that
M1: like it's tomorrow
that is the most ridiculous entry!
M2: well, did you follow the "life" link after that?
it's by definition, a multi-faceted concept
ultimate is so damn...definate
I much rather talk about the penultimate
M1: i'm also going to start using the word "disambiguation"
M2: so, what's going to happen right before the end of the universe, hmmm?
M1: rock and roll?
M1: cheese sandwiches?
M2: That would be cool
M2: Cats and manicures?
M1: disambiguation.
M2: that's a great word...I have to write it down and remember to use it
5.21.2005
I've been feeling blogless lately...not so much as "Where's my blog? I don't know where it went...somebody please...help me!"
But more of "Hello. I'm your blog. How come you haven't been writing in me? Is it something I did? No...wait...it's something I said, right? Why do you think your mind should be doing other things? Am I not good enough to satisfy your 'mental stimulation'?...It's that floozy of a notepad you've been gadding-about with again...isn't it! ISN'T IT?!?"
So, although the computer box has been calling my name, I've decided to avoid it in order to save at least a wee bit of my sanity. Not unlike my relationships in "real life", I have a much less clouded take on a situation when I step back and take a bird's eye view of what's going on . Wow...I just thought of the possibilities....if I were actually able to literally DO that...neat.
So. Because I've been absent, here's what I did this week.
1. I went to the Raveonettes show on Tuesday night. They are the coolest band around these days...Anyone here to corroborate this story? No? Ok. Well I like them lots and now it's Friday and there's still a ringing in my ear. So, they made an impression in my book. IF their style of music ends up being the next wave of music, I would be happy and smiling through those years...smiling in a nice, melancoly, pseduo-angry way....but smiling, nonetheless.
2. That's it. Number one pretty much encompasses my week. Get over it...I did.
Of course, my week was packed with a number of fillers...it's not like I stayed in bed the entire time. Although...you never know.
One of the many fillers, was a random text message I received at 1:56 a.m. Thursday night...I was already in bed...and not far from sleep...when my phone (in it's lame-ass message alert tone) rang in a newly received text message that said:
"Me 2 U sexy ass thing"
Granted, it took me a few mintues of trying to figure out if I had drunkenly initiated this flirty high-tech banter...but, then I realized that I didn't recognize the phone number and, besides, I'm not nearly that suave.
But...it got me thinking...this was obviously an acknowledgement of someone's attempt to make contact...so, what could this first message possbily be? The reply was so very cryptic...I've racked my brain...I want to know.
I've finally excepted that I'll never really know, but I CAN find satisfaction in creating my own reality. And in that reality, here's what I've come up with for the message that spured such an eloquent response as "Me 2 u sexy ass thing":
1. Frog giggin' 2 morrow. Mom's spear will t8k those kickers down. U gonna B there or R U goin' to the GED test? I'd rather be giggin'.
2. Blood's warm. Candles R lit. I have a tortured sense of cre8tivity. But U...U R so clean. U R so purile. I feel 2 many thorns R puncturing my flesh. I think the cre8tor is pulling me towards infinite darkeness...
3. I Belive in fucking Mir8cles!
4. Damn. I wish I was your lover.
That's all I's gots. If you have any suggestions, particularly if they are in referrence to Wham!, I'd be more than happy to hear them. Please...help me decifer the cryptic message...
But more of "Hello. I'm your blog. How come you haven't been writing in me? Is it something I did? No...wait...it's something I said, right? Why do you think your mind should be doing other things? Am I not good enough to satisfy your 'mental stimulation'?...It's that floozy of a notepad you've been gadding-about with again...isn't it! ISN'T IT?!?"
So, although the computer box has been calling my name, I've decided to avoid it in order to save at least a wee bit of my sanity. Not unlike my relationships in "real life", I have a much less clouded take on a situation when I step back and take a bird's eye view of what's going on . Wow...I just thought of the possibilities....if I were actually able to literally DO that...neat.
So. Because I've been absent, here's what I did this week.
1. I went to the Raveonettes show on Tuesday night. They are the coolest band around these days...Anyone here to corroborate this story? No? Ok. Well I like them lots and now it's Friday and there's still a ringing in my ear. So, they made an impression in my book. IF their style of music ends up being the next wave of music, I would be happy and smiling through those years...smiling in a nice, melancoly, pseduo-angry way....but smiling, nonetheless.
2. That's it. Number one pretty much encompasses my week. Get over it...I did.
Of course, my week was packed with a number of fillers...it's not like I stayed in bed the entire time. Although...you never know.
One of the many fillers, was a random text message I received at 1:56 a.m. Thursday night...I was already in bed...and not far from sleep...when my phone (in it's lame-ass message alert tone) rang in a newly received text message that said:
"Me 2 U sexy ass thing"
Granted, it took me a few mintues of trying to figure out if I had drunkenly initiated this flirty high-tech banter...but, then I realized that I didn't recognize the phone number and, besides, I'm not nearly that suave.
But...it got me thinking...this was obviously an acknowledgement of someone's attempt to make contact...so, what could this first message possbily be? The reply was so very cryptic...I've racked my brain...I want to know.
I've finally excepted that I'll never really know, but I CAN find satisfaction in creating my own reality. And in that reality, here's what I've come up with for the message that spured such an eloquent response as "Me 2 u sexy ass thing":
1. Frog giggin' 2 morrow. Mom's spear will t8k those kickers down. U gonna B there or R U goin' to the GED test? I'd rather be giggin'.
2. Blood's warm. Candles R lit. I have a tortured sense of cre8tivity. But U...U R so clean. U R so purile. I feel 2 many thorns R puncturing my flesh. I think the cre8tor is pulling me towards infinite darkeness...
3. I Belive in fucking Mir8cles!
4. Damn. I wish I was your lover.
That's all I's gots. If you have any suggestions, particularly if they are in referrence to Wham!, I'd be more than happy to hear them. Please...help me decifer the cryptic message...
5.16.2005
I've got reservations...'bout so many things...
Oh roommates...we all have issues with them....doors left unlocked...air conditioners left unattended at god-awful temperatures...dishes...let's not even go there with the dishes...
They're so great on one hand, but on the other...
I consider myself a pretty laid back person...
You've consumed my last piece of cheese? That's cool...What? My first born child wandered it's way into traffic? But he's ok...right? No big deal. You borrowed my truck and it found it's way into a ditch out in Manor? Whatev...we'll call a tow truck...
But...wait a minute. You've drank my last beer for the SECOND time in a row this weekend?
That's it. It's ON!
There's some things I can excuse. This...this...is not one of them. I don't think I was clear with my new male roommate when it came down to my beer sharing policies. Let's share...Barney style...whatever is mine is yours.
But...when it comes to beer...I have one, and only one rule...Never...nay, never ever...leave me with NO beer when I think I'm going to come home to at least one...frosty...cold beer.
We now have unspoken Issues.
They're so great on one hand, but on the other...
I consider myself a pretty laid back person...
You've consumed my last piece of cheese? That's cool...What? My first born child wandered it's way into traffic? But he's ok...right? No big deal. You borrowed my truck and it found it's way into a ditch out in Manor? Whatev...we'll call a tow truck...
But...wait a minute. You've drank my last beer for the SECOND time in a row this weekend?
That's it. It's ON!
There's some things I can excuse. This...this...is not one of them. I don't think I was clear with my new male roommate when it came down to my beer sharing policies. Let's share...Barney style...whatever is mine is yours.
But...when it comes to beer...I have one, and only one rule...Never...nay, never ever...leave me with NO beer when I think I'm going to come home to at least one...frosty...cold beer.
We now have unspoken Issues.
5.11.2005
I have something to admit. Go ahead and laugh at me...I deserve it.
I have what could be considered an unhealthy, undying love for the show Sabrina the Teenage Witch. I find myself watching it almost everyday while I eat lunch. Now, it's not THAT unhealthy, I mean, I don't record it or anything...nor do I purchase Sabrina memorabilia...
But, I actually do find this show (that was intended for 8-12 year old girls) quite funny at times.
I think my obsession comes from an unconscious desire to get back to my Clarissa Explains It All days...or more likely my Punky Brewster days (Soleil Moon Fry is just as captivating as an adult in a pre-teen sitcom).
And...a talking cat! Come'on now...who doesn't fantasize about their precious kitty talking? I can see you all ducking into the shameful shadows...
Whew. I'm glad I got that out. Now, pardon me, as I have to get back to watching Ambush Makeover...
I have what could be considered an unhealthy, undying love for the show Sabrina the Teenage Witch. I find myself watching it almost everyday while I eat lunch. Now, it's not THAT unhealthy, I mean, I don't record it or anything...nor do I purchase Sabrina memorabilia...
But, I actually do find this show (that was intended for 8-12 year old girls) quite funny at times.
I think my obsession comes from an unconscious desire to get back to my Clarissa Explains It All days...or more likely my Punky Brewster days (Soleil Moon Fry is just as captivating as an adult in a pre-teen sitcom).
And...a talking cat! Come'on now...who doesn't fantasize about their precious kitty talking? I can see you all ducking into the shameful shadows...
Whew. I'm glad I got that out. Now, pardon me, as I have to get back to watching Ambush Makeover...
5.08.2005
Wooooo! S A T U R...D......A.....um...Y......oh, who gives a fuck
Saturday nights these days have about as much meaning as....as...damn it. I can't even think of a good simile...and those are my favorite, for cryin' out loud!
It's just been one of those evenings, nay, days...where I can read into Everything that comes my way.
A group of sixteen year old sk8ers (that I will agree...are MUCH cooler than I am...or ever was, for that matter) passed by me today as I returned from a delivery and called me an asshole.
I'm not sure why. I actually didn't do or say anything to these kids.
But whatever...I still spent a good 20 minutes after that trying to sort it out in my head. You see, on one hand, I don't feel old enough to straight up condemn them and their random rude behavior...but on the other hand, I don't feel young enough to understand where the hell they are coming from. Did I used to go around calling people assholes for no reason?
It's quite possible. I seem to remember being a slightly to very angry youth...I don't particularly remember randomly calling anyone an asshole...but, I DO remember the drive by shoutings..."Hey Sister Catherine....SMOKE POT!!!" Oh...and how could I forget the "Just Say No" field tests that involved pulling up slowly next to helmet-clad middle school kids merrily biking home and propositioning, "Pssst...hey kid! Ya...you. Do you want some candy? No really, it's ok...I'm a friend of your mom's and she said it was fine.*" These field tests always worked out as planned with the kid saying "No!" and trying to peddle as fast as their Ninja Turtle L.A. Lights shoes could take them.
Not to digress too much, but that whole idea got started with a bit of bong passing and realizing that all of Nancy Regan's damn "Just Say No" propaganda, obviously, didn't work. Why? Well, we figured it was because they were going about it the wrong way. I had never once been offered drugs, candy, or a ride by a trench coat-wearing shadowy stranger or a ghetto talking gangsta'...
Rather, all the drugs that were initially offered to me came from my closest friends and fellow athletes. I felt rather gypped that I was never able to put to use "Just Say No" tactics that the public schools spent hours drilling into my head through informational films...So really, when it came down to it, I just felt like I was doing my duty as a student and citizen of Texas. Ya. Logical thinking, right?
This was actually meant to be a ranting post tonight...you know, one where I just list off all the shit that's pissed me off today, yesterday, and during my whole life that I've managed to keep bottled for the sake of socialization? Yeah. That stuff. But strangely enough, talking about the motivations of dickhead teenagers got it out...not bad.
Except for one thing. I made cornbread today. I don't even like cornbread. I just happened to have all the ingredients for cornbread. So, why not? So, now I have a loaf of cornbread that I ate a small slice off of...the rest will go to waste...and guess what, I STILL don't like cornbread.
Goodnight. I need the sleep...maybe it'll calm my brain and bring it down from it's current manic state.
*Mind you, this was merely a test...there were no real drugs being distributed to children...I'm not THAT evil...geez.
It's just been one of those evenings, nay, days...where I can read into Everything that comes my way.
A group of sixteen year old sk8ers (that I will agree...are MUCH cooler than I am...or ever was, for that matter) passed by me today as I returned from a delivery and called me an asshole.
I'm not sure why. I actually didn't do or say anything to these kids.
But whatever...I still spent a good 20 minutes after that trying to sort it out in my head. You see, on one hand, I don't feel old enough to straight up condemn them and their random rude behavior...but on the other hand, I don't feel young enough to understand where the hell they are coming from. Did I used to go around calling people assholes for no reason?
It's quite possible. I seem to remember being a slightly to very angry youth...I don't particularly remember randomly calling anyone an asshole...but, I DO remember the drive by shoutings..."Hey Sister Catherine....SMOKE POT!!!" Oh...and how could I forget the "Just Say No" field tests that involved pulling up slowly next to helmet-clad middle school kids merrily biking home and propositioning, "Pssst...hey kid! Ya...you. Do you want some candy? No really, it's ok...I'm a friend of your mom's and she said it was fine.*" These field tests always worked out as planned with the kid saying "No!" and trying to peddle as fast as their Ninja Turtle L.A. Lights shoes could take them.
Not to digress too much, but that whole idea got started with a bit of bong passing and realizing that all of Nancy Regan's damn "Just Say No" propaganda, obviously, didn't work. Why? Well, we figured it was because they were going about it the wrong way. I had never once been offered drugs, candy, or a ride by a trench coat-wearing shadowy stranger or a ghetto talking gangsta'...
Rather, all the drugs that were initially offered to me came from my closest friends and fellow athletes. I felt rather gypped that I was never able to put to use "Just Say No" tactics that the public schools spent hours drilling into my head through informational films...So really, when it came down to it, I just felt like I was doing my duty as a student and citizen of Texas. Ya. Logical thinking, right?
This was actually meant to be a ranting post tonight...you know, one where I just list off all the shit that's pissed me off today, yesterday, and during my whole life that I've managed to keep bottled for the sake of socialization? Yeah. That stuff. But strangely enough, talking about the motivations of dickhead teenagers got it out...not bad.
Except for one thing. I made cornbread today. I don't even like cornbread. I just happened to have all the ingredients for cornbread. So, why not? So, now I have a loaf of cornbread that I ate a small slice off of...the rest will go to waste...and guess what, I STILL don't like cornbread.
Goodnight. I need the sleep...maybe it'll calm my brain and bring it down from it's current manic state.
*Mind you, this was merely a test...there were no real drugs being distributed to children...I'm not THAT evil...geez.
5.06.2005
I don't have much to say...but I wanted to give you this fun and exciting link:
Aunt Flow's World of Menstration Euphemisms
In my opinion, most are misses...BUT read through them and I promise you'll find yourself at least one hit. My favorites included: Ridin' the Cotton Pony (this is actually how I found myself at this site to begin with), Taking Carrie to the Prom, and Trolling for Vampires.
Have fun!
Aunt Flow's World of Menstration Euphemisms
In my opinion, most are misses...BUT read through them and I promise you'll find yourself at least one hit. My favorites included: Ridin' the Cotton Pony (this is actually how I found myself at this site to begin with), Taking Carrie to the Prom, and Trolling for Vampires.
Have fun!
5.05.2005
Don't be afraid of freedom!
My new roommate has just installed wireless internet in my house.
I'm unstoppable! Oh...look...I'm over here! Don't look now...but, I'm over there! What? Where am I? I don't know...the possibilities are limitless.
Ok. I'm actually in my backyard.
But, that's cool enough...because now I don't have to be so mischevious about my smoking...or my late night listening to eighties and early ninties music, or my chanting to the ancient war-gods...
My new sort of virtual freedom has lead me to a feeling of real freedom...like I felt free to take a couple of my new roommate's select Bass Pale Ales (with the intent of making it up...come on, I going to replace them...I won't let you down...I mean, gotta have SOME faith).
Relying upon my instincts and my god-given liberty, I grabbed the first beer in the fridge that presented itself to me. I was really ready to enjoy this...I had my beer-key in pocket...my intent on sitting down at my computer fresh in mind...I proceeded to pop open this ill-gotten beer only to find that it had already been....had.
Apparently, my new roommate and I share more than one thing in common.
We both like to waste not, want not...the beer I was about to steal was already half drunk and re-capped...not unlike myself. Of cousre, this didn't stop me from moving on to the next one in the pack...
I was actually more pleased than pissed. I've done this so many times myself that this experience actually felt more pleasant and familiar than annoying...
But, don't think that I'm going to overlook the leaving of the toliet seat up...
I'm unstoppable! Oh...look...I'm over here! Don't look now...but, I'm over there! What? Where am I? I don't know...the possibilities are limitless.
Ok. I'm actually in my backyard.
But, that's cool enough...because now I don't have to be so mischevious about my smoking...or my late night listening to eighties and early ninties music, or my chanting to the ancient war-gods...
My new sort of virtual freedom has lead me to a feeling of real freedom...like I felt free to take a couple of my new roommate's select Bass Pale Ales (with the intent of making it up...come on, I going to replace them...I won't let you down...I mean, gotta have SOME faith).
Relying upon my instincts and my god-given liberty, I grabbed the first beer in the fridge that presented itself to me. I was really ready to enjoy this...I had my beer-key in pocket...my intent on sitting down at my computer fresh in mind...I proceeded to pop open this ill-gotten beer only to find that it had already been....had.
Apparently, my new roommate and I share more than one thing in common.
We both like to waste not, want not...the beer I was about to steal was already half drunk and re-capped...not unlike myself. Of cousre, this didn't stop me from moving on to the next one in the pack...
I was actually more pleased than pissed. I've done this so many times myself that this experience actually felt more pleasant and familiar than annoying...
But, don't think that I'm going to overlook the leaving of the toliet seat up...
5.03.2005
Highway to the danger zone...
So, here I am...at my house...getting used to not being alone in the middle of the night. It's kinda funny...last year it took quite some time for me to get used to living alone for the first time in my life...oh, silly, silly life.
Just a couple of weeks ago my roommate...you know the perfect one who's "lived" here for the past six months?...informed me that she would like to stay in the house for a little bit longer. She had told me a few months back that she would be moving out on May 1st...the plan was that she was going to move in with her boyfriend and everything would be great.
Unfortunatley, her boyfriend was laid off from his job just a couple of weeks ago...sooooooo, this leads to that and TADA!!! Now I have TWO roommates!
I'm actually ok with all of this. They're both really cool people...and it is sort of nice having some non-feline company around every once in a while. But, I just wasn't ready for the reality of it.
Last night, around 2 a.m., I was kinda caught, well...off guard. After a few beers at the bar, I came home and started doing the normal things I do after becoming slightly intoxicated.
You know, blarring Bananarama, lighting up incense to prepare for my devious in-house smoking, and, of course, hanging upside down from the chin-up bar that my previous roomie installed in my bedroom's door frame.
It was all very Top Gun.
I had finished approximately one upside down sit up (which is my long standing maximum) and had grounded myself when I was abnormally compelled to put on some actual PJs (in all honesty, I much rather hang out and sleep in less clothes rather than more...not to be sleazy or anything...)
SO. Anyway...it was a good thing I did, because around 2:06 a.m. my roommate and her boyfriend decided that it was time to come "home". I naturally fucking got freaked out and exclaimed, "Oh God!...Jesus!" Roomie's boyfriend's reply to this was, "That's right...it's both God and Jesus....how ya doin?"
Things were ok after that...I explained that I just wasn't used to anybody else besides myself coming home that late and that I'd get used to it...
This is what was coming out of my mouth...but, in my head, all I could think about was that I was glad that they hadn't come home 10 minutes earlier...I think if that had happened, I would've immediately found myself footing all of May and June's rent by myself....
Just a couple of weeks ago my roommate...you know the perfect one who's "lived" here for the past six months?...informed me that she would like to stay in the house for a little bit longer. She had told me a few months back that she would be moving out on May 1st...the plan was that she was going to move in with her boyfriend and everything would be great.
Unfortunatley, her boyfriend was laid off from his job just a couple of weeks ago...sooooooo, this leads to that and TADA!!! Now I have TWO roommates!
I'm actually ok with all of this. They're both really cool people...and it is sort of nice having some non-feline company around every once in a while. But, I just wasn't ready for the reality of it.
Last night, around 2 a.m., I was kinda caught, well...off guard. After a few beers at the bar, I came home and started doing the normal things I do after becoming slightly intoxicated.
You know, blarring Bananarama, lighting up incense to prepare for my devious in-house smoking, and, of course, hanging upside down from the chin-up bar that my previous roomie installed in my bedroom's door frame.
It was all very Top Gun.
I had finished approximately one upside down sit up (which is my long standing maximum) and had grounded myself when I was abnormally compelled to put on some actual PJs (in all honesty, I much rather hang out and sleep in less clothes rather than more...not to be sleazy or anything...)
SO. Anyway...it was a good thing I did, because around 2:06 a.m. my roommate and her boyfriend decided that it was time to come "home". I naturally fucking got freaked out and exclaimed, "Oh God!...Jesus!" Roomie's boyfriend's reply to this was, "That's right...it's both God and Jesus....how ya doin?"
Things were ok after that...I explained that I just wasn't used to anybody else besides myself coming home that late and that I'd get used to it...
This is what was coming out of my mouth...but, in my head, all I could think about was that I was glad that they hadn't come home 10 minutes earlier...I think if that had happened, I would've immediately found myself footing all of May and June's rent by myself....
