12.16.2005
Feliz Navidad...from the bottom of my car.
Smarty Chirs Mer everyone! I've been having far too much fun with Merry Christmas anagrams lately...
That's my favorite...and the only one I could come up with in under a minute as I re-arranged my friend's "Merry Christmas" letter blocks...while she had her back turned, of course.
But, thanks to the power of the internet, I looked up some more to share....without using my brain! Including:
Smarty Scrim Her
AND...my second favorite:
Ass Cry Therm Rim
Yeah.
So, I'm not sure what it is about Chris Mer that brings out the evil in people, but...I'll tell you where it goes...straight to me and other people who are lucky enough to be employed in customer service this time of year. In the past week of work, I've endured more shit-treatin' than I'm usually subjected to in an entire year...
I guess I usually don't mind it when I deserve it...I take it...and, even when I don't deserve it, I can generally just shrug it off...but most of the time, I don't think I deserve it. As low on the "beneficial to society" chain as my job is, I still do it as well as I possibly can...I mean, I don't walk around with delivery driver pride, but, fuck, there's some things that are just out of my control.
I actually think that my *extensive* years of customer service have made me more zen than bitter. Basically, unless someone's life or lively-hood is at stake, you're not going to catch me freaking out...because, hey....IT'S NOT THAT BIG OF A DEAL and it can be fixed. Because when you look at the big picture, it's just kind of hard to get upset and take it to heart when somebody gets an unwanted olive on their pizza.
They kill girl babies in China. Isn't there a war, or something, going on...? Are there still starving people in Africa? Maybe they want this pizza, because, there is NO WAY that I'm going to eat THAT...sick.
Yell at me ALL you want...get it out...it's good to vent! You've chosen your battle...and apparently, this is as good as it gets. Oh yeah...and go ahead and complain to "management"...this doesn't change the fact that most restaurants are run by underpaid part-time workers that turn over about once a month...so, once the staff that keeps fucking up gets a good "talkin' to"...they're out the door and another group of slackers take their place...but, if it helps you feel like you're contributing to the betterment of the restaurant industry in general, please...complain/suggest away.
My brother and I were at a restaurant a few months back...and, as we passed the Suggestions? Comments? Thoughts? box...he, um suggested, that everytime I encountered one of these boxes that I should leave a hurried and scrawled note that reads only: "I'm on to you..."
I think that's a good idea...because, it may have the effect of leaving someone, hell, ANYONE, paranoid...which is far more than any reasonable suggestion will get you.
In another dimension of perceived futility...the JV delinquent students are off for Christmas break as of today...the entire program, full of middle school and high school kids AND their parents, was at the school today. It was interesting to meet the kid's parents...I'm also pretty sad that I'm not going to see these kids again. They've graduated, in a sense, and get to go back to their real schools...I guess I kinda became friendly with some of them and then, next thing I know, their gone..I figure that's what school's all about though, so I best deal with it.
Although, I did have a fun time explaining to one of the students what my undergrad degree consisted of!
Hey...he asked. I told him that sociology is basically what psychology is to invidivual people...
I tried to explain to him that it's the study of groups of people and the way they act...and that people come up with theories (uh...individual idea that lots of people agree on) on why groups of people do what they do...and, I studied their studies...I guess. I mean, when I wasn't being hungover.
I left out the last part.
His sister and mother were also at the table during this conversation and, after I said what I thought was a decent explaination for a my half-assed liberal arts degree, his sister chimed in with, "So, I guess you know why Joe acts so different from the group!"
My response was a futile, "Uh...no...THAT would be psychology...I only took one class in that. But, put a bunch of him together, and maybe I could help you."
Sorry. I do my best.
That's my favorite...and the only one I could come up with in under a minute as I re-arranged my friend's "Merry Christmas" letter blocks...while she had her back turned, of course.
But, thanks to the power of the internet, I looked up some more to share....without using my brain! Including:
Smarty Scrim Her
AND...my second favorite:
Ass Cry Therm Rim
Yeah.
So, I'm not sure what it is about Chris Mer that brings out the evil in people, but...I'll tell you where it goes...straight to me and other people who are lucky enough to be employed in customer service this time of year. In the past week of work, I've endured more shit-treatin' than I'm usually subjected to in an entire year...
I guess I usually don't mind it when I deserve it...I take it...and, even when I don't deserve it, I can generally just shrug it off...but most of the time, I don't think I deserve it. As low on the "beneficial to society" chain as my job is, I still do it as well as I possibly can...I mean, I don't walk around with delivery driver pride, but, fuck, there's some things that are just out of my control.
I actually think that my *extensive* years of customer service have made me more zen than bitter. Basically, unless someone's life or lively-hood is at stake, you're not going to catch me freaking out...because, hey....IT'S NOT THAT BIG OF A DEAL and it can be fixed. Because when you look at the big picture, it's just kind of hard to get upset and take it to heart when somebody gets an unwanted olive on their pizza.
They kill girl babies in China. Isn't there a war, or something, going on...? Are there still starving people in Africa? Maybe they want this pizza, because, there is NO WAY that I'm going to eat THAT...sick.
Yell at me ALL you want...get it out...it's good to vent! You've chosen your battle...and apparently, this is as good as it gets. Oh yeah...and go ahead and complain to "management"...this doesn't change the fact that most restaurants are run by underpaid part-time workers that turn over about once a month...so, once the staff that keeps fucking up gets a good "talkin' to"...they're out the door and another group of slackers take their place...but, if it helps you feel like you're contributing to the betterment of the restaurant industry in general, please...complain/suggest away.
My brother and I were at a restaurant a few months back...and, as we passed the Suggestions? Comments? Thoughts? box...he, um suggested, that everytime I encountered one of these boxes that I should leave a hurried and scrawled note that reads only: "I'm on to you..."
I think that's a good idea...because, it may have the effect of leaving someone, hell, ANYONE, paranoid...which is far more than any reasonable suggestion will get you.
In another dimension of perceived futility...the JV delinquent students are off for Christmas break as of today...the entire program, full of middle school and high school kids AND their parents, was at the school today. It was interesting to meet the kid's parents...I'm also pretty sad that I'm not going to see these kids again. They've graduated, in a sense, and get to go back to their real schools...I guess I kinda became friendly with some of them and then, next thing I know, their gone..I figure that's what school's all about though, so I best deal with it.
Although, I did have a fun time explaining to one of the students what my undergrad degree consisted of!
Hey...he asked. I told him that sociology is basically what psychology is to invidivual people...
I tried to explain to him that it's the study of groups of people and the way they act...and that people come up with theories (uh...individual idea that lots of people agree on) on why groups of people do what they do...and, I studied their studies...I guess. I mean, when I wasn't being hungover.
I left out the last part.
His sister and mother were also at the table during this conversation and, after I said what I thought was a decent explaination for a my half-assed liberal arts degree, his sister chimed in with, "So, I guess you know why Joe acts so different from the group!"
My response was a futile, "Uh...no...THAT would be psychology...I only took one class in that. But, put a bunch of him together, and maybe I could help you."
Sorry. I do my best.
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I worked as a cook in a kitchen many years ago. It was only for a short while, but it taught me just how much work goes into the process of food prep and service. Couple the amount of energy & effort required with miserably low pay and voila: you've got a factory for cranking out Homicidal Maniacs or Zen Masters.
I prefer to imagine there are more ZMs than HMs. Why else do people who've worked in food service tip others so well? Why do we not send waiters back and forth, back and forth 800 times during a meal? Why do we say please and thank you when we order and when we get our food? Easy. Because we've been there. We've done that. We've remade a BLT sandwich 4 times because some c**ksucking bitch from hell decided she wasn't pleased with how crispy (or non-crispy as it were) the bacon was!! AHHHHHH!!!
I digress.
You know how some countries have 2-yr mandatory military service for young ppl? Well, I think we should have that here, except instead of military service, food service. I tell ya, we'd all be winners, as there'd be a lot less bodily fluid added to food...and I ain't talkin' tears, people.
I prefer to imagine there are more ZMs than HMs. Why else do people who've worked in food service tip others so well? Why do we not send waiters back and forth, back and forth 800 times during a meal? Why do we say please and thank you when we order and when we get our food? Easy. Because we've been there. We've done that. We've remade a BLT sandwich 4 times because some c**ksucking bitch from hell decided she wasn't pleased with how crispy (or non-crispy as it were) the bacon was!! AHHHHHH!!!
I digress.
You know how some countries have 2-yr mandatory military service for young ppl? Well, I think we should have that here, except instead of military service, food service. I tell ya, we'd all be winners, as there'd be a lot less bodily fluid added to food...and I ain't talkin' tears, people.
I was a blockbuster zen master back in the day. I could carry 30 vhs (I said back in the day) boxes stacked between my chin and left hand, rewind 5 tapes at a time and do check ins with lightning speed. But I never could stop people from believing, quite loudly usually, that they had responsibly turned in their tapes on time and that I was the evil one who maliciously gave a $3.22 late fee out of pure spite. Although I do fondly remember the only customer who ever tipped me. He paid his late fees while still declaring his innocence and then threw the $0.78 of change at my head and walked out swearing never to return. Good times.
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# posted by 
: 12:31 PM
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