8.09.2004
Lucky!
I've officially been back in Austin for just over four hours. It feels weird. I just saw Napoleon Dynamite as well. Quite possibly the best movie ever.
I've also noticed that my roommate has taken the Al-Anon "One Day at a Time" approach to moving out of the house... this is just confusing me. I come home and I think I've been burglarized because my end table is missing...and so is the bamboo plant. But why would they leave the DVDs and stereo stuff? I don't know...I've had stranger shit happen to me. It took a couple of minutes to adjust and to realize what was going on...'twas a bizarre re-introduction to my home. It also looks like a yeti took a shower in my bathroom...I have absolutely no explanation for this...I cleaned it before I left...hmmmmm.
Ok. I'm going to try get out some details a little at a time. It would be an unruly post if I did it all at once...so one day at a time, my friends.
.
Saturday: I'll skip the intro road trip. Due to my beer drinking and staying up til 4 a.m., I was fortunately able to sleep through most of this drive. I woke up at the Cracker Barrel in Baton Rouge. Hey kids! Don't forget to stop here on your next drive through the ass-crack of America! Hmmm....will I gouge myself on biscuits and gravy or sausage and a stick of butter? They actually have a low-carb section on their menu...kill me now.
We arrived around 5 p.m. with just enough time for everybody (with the exception of myself...being led by the grace of god) to get a pre-dusk dip in the crystal blue jellyfish infested water. Minutes later, there was enough screaming and crying to start any family vacation.
Sunday: So...I lived in a dorm for two years. It was refreshing to re-live these years while sharing a bedroom with my little brother. Granted, my little brother is 22, so it's not that bad. Just don't touch my stuff, o.k.?
I also went to the beach...I imagined that I saw Gidget, Annette and Frankie waving to me as I boogie boarded into the surf.
Monday: more beachin'...I think I'll stop saying that after this day...just assume it happened everyday unless I say otherwise.
This is also where the real hell began. I was roped into going to check out the wave runner and deep-sea fishing options. I should have known better. Everywhere we went outside of the condo facilities involved moving 11 people at the same time....11 fucking people...3 under the age of 11...so here we all go.
I was already feeling a bit antsy from my lack of cigarettes and personal space. I thought this was just going to be a small jaunt lasting no more than an hour. Boy, was I wrong. It turns out my crazy stepmother had plans to rope everyone into eating dinner at the Beached Whale or something like that. Did I mention that this restaurant offers a pre-dinner show of fish cleaning? Apparently if you take one of their deep-sea fishing trips, they cordially clean and prepare the fish that you catch...right before your eyes!
By this time, the fish show and 11 person bumble fuck had turned my stomach into knots...or maybe it was the Cracker Barrel finally catching up to me. Either way, I had to beg my dad to drive me back to the condo before everyone sat down for dinner...and before I went mental on their asses...
There's more to this story, but I must sleep now. I'll try to recount more fun in the upcoming days...when it's still fresh on my mind. And maybe pictures? Unfortunately, I'm not much of a photographer...but, I may post what I do have.
I've also noticed that my roommate has taken the Al-Anon "One Day at a Time" approach to moving out of the house... this is just confusing me. I come home and I think I've been burglarized because my end table is missing...and so is the bamboo plant. But why would they leave the DVDs and stereo stuff? I don't know...I've had stranger shit happen to me. It took a couple of minutes to adjust and to realize what was going on...'twas a bizarre re-introduction to my home. It also looks like a yeti took a shower in my bathroom...I have absolutely no explanation for this...I cleaned it before I left...hmmmmm.
Ok. I'm going to try get out some details a little at a time. It would be an unruly post if I did it all at once...so one day at a time, my friends.
.
Saturday: I'll skip the intro road trip. Due to my beer drinking and staying up til 4 a.m., I was fortunately able to sleep through most of this drive. I woke up at the Cracker Barrel in Baton Rouge. Hey kids! Don't forget to stop here on your next drive through the ass-crack of America! Hmmm....will I gouge myself on biscuits and gravy or sausage and a stick of butter? They actually have a low-carb section on their menu...kill me now.
We arrived around 5 p.m. with just enough time for everybody (with the exception of myself...being led by the grace of god) to get a pre-dusk dip in the crystal blue jellyfish infested water. Minutes later, there was enough screaming and crying to start any family vacation.
Sunday: So...I lived in a dorm for two years. It was refreshing to re-live these years while sharing a bedroom with my little brother. Granted, my little brother is 22, so it's not that bad. Just don't touch my stuff, o.k.?
I also went to the beach...I imagined that I saw Gidget, Annette and Frankie waving to me as I boogie boarded into the surf.
Monday: more beachin'...I think I'll stop saying that after this day...just assume it happened everyday unless I say otherwise.
This is also where the real hell began. I was roped into going to check out the wave runner and deep-sea fishing options. I should have known better. Everywhere we went outside of the condo facilities involved moving 11 people at the same time....11 fucking people...3 under the age of 11...so here we all go.
I was already feeling a bit antsy from my lack of cigarettes and personal space. I thought this was just going to be a small jaunt lasting no more than an hour. Boy, was I wrong. It turns out my crazy stepmother had plans to rope everyone into eating dinner at the Beached Whale or something like that. Did I mention that this restaurant offers a pre-dinner show of fish cleaning? Apparently if you take one of their deep-sea fishing trips, they cordially clean and prepare the fish that you catch...right before your eyes!
By this time, the fish show and 11 person bumble fuck had turned my stomach into knots...or maybe it was the Cracker Barrel finally catching up to me. Either way, I had to beg my dad to drive me back to the condo before everyone sat down for dinner...and before I went mental on their asses...
There's more to this story, but I must sleep now. I'll try to recount more fun in the upcoming days...when it's still fresh on my mind. And maybe pictures? Unfortunately, I'm not much of a photographer...but, I may post what I do have.
